Even the strongest and the most positive persons have come across the haters, the bullies and people who are extremely envious. Who are constantly degrading your confidence and trying to pull you down. They are there everywhere, schools, colleges and workplace. They crack jokes which only they find funny, they try and prove that you are inferior to them. They stomp on you and try to rise up. I am sure you must have encountered them at least once or twice.
They are called ‘bullies.‘ The people who push others down to pull themselves up.
How do you identify a bully?
1. This person cracks jokes on things that you have no control over. They crack nasty jokes almost about everything around you.
2. This person tries to control you mentally and if they can’t they try physically. Like they try to snatch your belongings.
3. Constantly criticizes, calls you names, tells you hurtful words, passes mean comments and hits you where it hurts the most without being sorry.
4. Your energy, positivity and happiness hits rock bottom around them.
Why does someone bully a person? The only answer I have is, lack of confidence. They aint happy with their lives and are constantly finding flaws with someone else’s life. They have a void, few insecurities and those voids can never be filled. They try to throw themselves upon you, proving that they are powerful because who does not like to be powerful especially when they can control a person.
Don’t make it about yourself. It isn’t about you, it’s about them. You are perfect the way you are. The way you look at the world is a direct reflection of how you look at yourself. You may be perfect at what you do, you are happy with your work but somehow they find mistakes or are not happy with your work. These people can never be happy because they don’t understand the concept that happiness lies within yourself.
Let me narrate an incident to you. I was in my first year when I came across this confident, frank and pretty friendly person. Initially we had conversations and I considered him to be my friend totally unaware of the term ‘toxic friends’. Slowly he started correcting me when I made tiny negligible mistakes, I mistook that as care. But as ill-luck would have it, these corrections became taunting and then I became the butt of all his jokes. A foe with the mask of a friend. These kind of people shatter your confidence first and self-respect later. This may sound like I am venting out my anger but trust me guys, it took me 3 years to understand and now I have reached my saturation point, finally snapping all my ties with him. Better late than never. I would not want any of my reader friends to go through this and hence this post.
How do you deal with such negative and shallow people? After you identify them, try and avoid them at first, but hey! They are bullies, they won’t stop. They will try and come back to you to degrade your mental peace and when they do this, confront. Talk to them. Let them know that their words or actions are hurting you and you would not like it if this continued, still if they don’t listen, fight back. In all these, do not forget to share about your situation to your confidants. Do not give up.
I would like to conclude the post with few beautiful lines of an amazing soul.
“Here we stand in the light of day, let the storm rage on, the cold never bothered me anyway.”