I Am Not Claustrophobic, Anymore! 

28. 05. 17

Losing someone is one of the harsh realities of life. It is harsh but like always, truth is inevitable. It takes hell lot of time to accept that truth and make it a part of our life. By losing, I do not mean, not talking. By losing, I mean death. I lost my grandmother today who was an eternal part of me. She was quite a distance away from me, we didn’t meet every year but since distance increases​ love, our love kept increasing like the distance. Though she didn’t talk to me everyday but I saw and felt and lived with her reflection since day one in the form of my mother. Bangalore has been tough or has been easy but has been truly worthy. They tell, time heals the pain but the fact remains, that with time, you start moving on with the pain. That pain becomes a part of you. Surprisingly, when look back, you wonder how did you overcome all the pain. You never want to let go of a person you love, so selfish we are! Things we never dare to even think sometimes happen and that is when you expand your horizons. Death is not a small thing. That person takes a part of you forever and today, when she left, she took away my claustrophobia from me. Definitely, your loved ones know what is troubling you!

I remember, I was not claustrophobic, that was induced in me by another mortal and today, an immortal soul disappeared, magically taking all my fears away! Suddenly, the darkness that haunted me, now gives me peace. I gave her the closure she awaited dearly for and in return she became my closure. A little guilt will always linger that I could not meet her but aren’t we always guilty of something or the other everytime? I know, five years down the lane, I will be proud of myself for all the love I gave to people despite their despites. One thing after the other, another fear will be fought, another war to be won and another heart still to win. I ain’t giving up soon! Yet the toughest battles are still to be fought but for now, let me sleep in the gaurded arms of my grandmother!

Dida, your beautiful soul will rest in peace!

13 Days in Bengaluru! 

The featured image of this post is quite unusual and miles apart from the regular color combinations. So is the weather and roads of my old city love, Bengaluru. I was here in this city even the previous year yet this place seems, new and unknown. Maybe, that is the beauty this city beholds, it has something anew to offer everytime you visit here. Last year, that journey happened because of a lie and this year, that lie has been amended to truth! How beautifully fate works, I didn’t plan to come here again, it just happened. Few people did change but it is not the fault of a city to transform us, it is us, solely us to transform and become badder or better! 

The traffic is huge, the jams are inevitable and people are infinite. You stop more than you move. You reach your destination by applying brakes and not by accelerating. The riders have this great way of communication, that is, they look into each other’s eyes and understand which way they are going. This way of commuting is more safer than blinking the tail lights in your vehicle. As a kid, I understood that, the green signal signifies start but here, it is orange that urges you to accelerate and zoom away! Everyone seems in a hurry, like they are going to miss the spaceship to the moon. People seem to forget, that footpaths are for pedestrians and not for bikers. Yet, when you observe carefully, you understand that everyone has to reach somewhere, this kind of understanding helps avoid accidents. Afterall, you are stuck all the time in jams, how will accidents happen?  

The weather is more like your clingy girlfriend or your over possessive boyfriend, it can change its mood anytime! The mornings are bright, sunny and hot and the nights suddenly turn windy and rainy. It starts raining out of no where and gives no indication or hint before the downpour starts. Electricity happens to compliment this weather perfectly! As soon as it starts raining, the electricity vanishes as if, the electrons are enjoying the rain too! The night sends chill down your spine and in the morning, sweat droplets run down your forehead. You are pretty much confused, you live two different cities is what you feel. Yet, they tell that, Bengaluru has the best weathers. 

Jump back to my previous blogs and you will know that, I fall in love with pretty much anything and everything and that is why I fell in love with this unusually​beautiful city, Bengaluru! 

A New City, Another Different Story! 

I am back to this space after a pretty long time and I have been missing it way too much! 

As usual, I do not know where to start from, I do not know, which part of this story to tell you guys first. Again, let’s start from the start! 

We all have an undying passion for something or the other. My undying passion is for writing and it does not seem to fade out soon. WordPress has given me a different world altogether, I met my friends who are my virtual family, my soulmate and also, this fetched me my job! A dream job! I don’t know how to thank WordPress for all these! 

I never wanted to get into a software job and slog from 9am to 5pm, under someone! Nah! That isn’t me. I slogged and was rotten enough on the benches of my high school or junior college. Engineering was much fun though, the benches and the classroom will surely miss me because I hardly sat on them! 

Tomorrow is 8th May, 2017 and tomorrow will also be the last day of my engineering days. Tomorrow, will be one of the best days of college. The sad part being, I will be leaving the city where, I am born and brought up. This is the first time, I will be leaving my parents and staying alone, it seems fun! It is pretty much fun but equally upsetting. I can now feel the transition from a little girl to a woman who knows what she wants out of life and a lady who has decided whom to marry. Tomorrow, marks the beginning of our eternal love and unspoken vows that we took the previous year! May 8th has always something beautiful and grand to offer. Happy Mother’s Day to all the mother’s in advance! 

Two big decisions of life, marriage and career, have already been decided, all I have to do now is, enjoy the process of turning into a butterfly from a cocoon. I know, the people who are leaving along with me and have stayed over 21years in one place, that how difficult the moment would be, when you see, your flight leaving the grounds of your city. Your heart will further sink in when you see the wheels touching a new ground, a new place, new people and yet, a new story has just begun. The people who are coming back to home, trust me, that’s the best place to live. Value and cherish those little moments with your family. 

It has been five straight nights that I have not been sleeping and even if I did, I woke up yelling, ‘mom!’ The nights are mostly spent by staring at the sea or thinking of how to react when I see my parents leave. The moment they turn back and get into the cab, I will be all teary, yet, I explain myself that my dreams will bring me back to them. Mom already has so much happiness in her eyes when I talk about my work. That is what I want, she should be happy for what I am doing, pride will come sooner or later. 

To reach somewhere, you need to move out from your comfort zone. Moving out, staying alone, doing what I love and having my love beside, I could not ask for more. I just wish, the day, they leave, I don’t cry. They​ should not be leaving the city with a heavy heart after all, the city is too beautiful for someone’s tears. I have been to the place and thoroughly enjoyed the stay. Also, the next time, I come home, I will be travelling alone for the first time. Too many firsts 2017 is going to see, too many firsts yet to come!

All the best to all of them who are going to be my co-passengers in this amazingly adventurous journey and to all of them who aren’t a part, I love you guys! The next post would be on the day, I reach the city, till then, adios! 

Flee! 

A little​ talk with all of them who are going to take a step and end it all. Suicide is not the solution!

Being alone is scary, very scary, sometimes, this loneliness drives us till a point where, you cant take it anymore and decide to end it. All the facts of life fade away, all the love just vanishes. You lock yourself up, start preferring darkness over light and avoid any kind of human interaction. You are sometimes happy, sometimes sad and sometimes happy that you are sad!

We are always taught, two methods of defence in life, fight and flight. Mind you, flight doesn’t exist in a normal child’s dictionary. People who flee are cowards and being coward is death. We all are brought up with few stereotypical quotes like, fortune favours the brave and bravery is life, cowardice is death. Do we even stop and think about why do

 we sometimes fall weak and take a break?

Calm down, love, calm down! Feeling​ low is okay but living with that fear is not. Fleeing away from a certain situation is normal but don’t flee from every situation. Every battle is not yours to be fought, few battles are meant to be lost. That doesn’t make you a loser, that makes you prepared for other tough battles. Life is always going to be unfair but sweetheart, suicide is not an option! It was never an option.

I will not ask you for once to think about the people you love, it is not necessary that they love you back but it is important to acknowledge the fact that you are capable of giving love, few aren’t blessed with this bliss, think about them who have lost their someone with whom they shared everything, maybe they will never open up to anyone else again. Maybe you are that someone to someone! 

You never know what miracles you are creating in someone else’s life right now! Maybe, today if you stop that one step towards death, you will stop many steps towards the end tomorrow. I

 agree honey, life has been unfair but don’t you see, all the beautiful moments you have created out of this unfairness? I emphasize with the truth that, you have seen a lot which you weren’t supposed to but don’t you see, all these tests have made you better? I understand, you don’t deserve this feeling of being left and devastated but didn’t this teach you to value others feelings?


Yes, it’s okay to flee, flee back from that balcony you just thought to jump and end everything, flee away from that bottle of sadness you are holding and flee towards happiness, positivity and love! This moment, you don’t see any but sometime later, you will be a part of all the wonders that will happen in this planet! 

Hold on, till your last breath, till the sun decides not to rise, hold on, till you finally win a battle of your worth, hold on because suicide is never a solution! 



Dear Girl-in-the-Purple-Dress, say yes to yourself before him

Dear Girl-in-the-Purple-Dress

 

Happy birthday!

 

I know it was your birthday, like almost everyone else in the showroom did, because of the umpteen times you mentioned it to the guy accompanying you. I also know you turned 20 that day, like everyone else did, because of the umpteen minus one times you asked him if it was “appropriate for a girl who has just turned 20”.


For the complete post, click on the link below, 

http://www.bonobology.com/relationships/dating/185-dear-girl-in-the-purple-dress-say-yes-to-yourself-before-him

This post was written by Swaty Prakash  and first appeared on Bonobology.com

A different review. Kong Skull Island. 

 I did not edit this, no, I didn’t! Yes! This is how fierce the poster of Kong looks. I am not going to give a detailed movie review as this is the first Kong movie, I have watched. Yes! I do not know what was I doing all these years! Pity me! 

I was blown away by the trailers and I had to watch the movie! I did not know whether I would like the movie but now, I promise, I will try and watch all the Kong movies. A friend of mine told me that this is the only movie in which Kong doesn’t die, I wonder, how will I confirm my tears when I see him dying! 

I would also like to mention that, I appreciate the actors, Sameul L. Jackson and John C. Reilly who made the situation look very realistic. I could feel that I am there and on a mission with the team. 

This movie has a few very good dialogues which actually make us think about the sole reason of our existence. Humans try to rule everywhere and almost this has gotten over our head that we deserve everything on this planet. Let me tell you, we don’t deserve everything, we force ourselves on mother nature. Humans completely forget that there are other beings and we should live by striking a balance! 

Kong doesn’t try to hurt the humans, Kong just protects it’s kingdom because he is the king and the only hope of other humans and beings in the Skull Island. If we would hinder some other mortals area, even we would have a fight or if the people who don’t want to include in a brawl would sit and resolve the issue. Kong cannot do this, he cannot sit and resolve, he cannot speak, all he can do is to destroy the people who destroyed it’s kingdom.  Fair, isn’t it? 

A story takes an interesting turn when the humans learn about Kong, who is the only king of the island and has no successor left. Kong protects them from the, ‘Skull Crawlers,’ who harms the island. Kong is huge, scary and yet has a heart and can think. We can tell that Kong can think because he uses an old, rusted chain with a weight attached to it, of a wrecked ship to protect the girl (Brie Larson), who claims herself to be an anti war photographer,  from a Skull Crawler. 

After all that the humans learn, they try to attack Kong because the humans think that they are the only kings of the earth. They finally get out of the island and Kong doesn’t die in this movie! Yayy! 

This movie drives home the point that the earth isn’t just ours and we humans should not take all these for granted. The animals do not hurt anyone intentionally though there are some rare cases, they only attack when they are scared or they are protecting something. Wouldn’t we humans react in the same way? If nothing at all, we are blessed with a vocal cord and we can always be vocal with our issues but what about animals? 

Image Courtesy : Google Images.

The above content is subject to copyright and are purely my thoughts, they mean no offence to anyone.